The Shock of the Fall by Nathan Filer
Rating: ★★★★
The Shock of the Fall is a beautiful novel about grief, guilt, and a young man's decent into mental illness. I related to this book, not because I'm very familiar with mental illness, but because our main character is dealing with the death of his older brother, Simon. My older brother passed away when I was five. His name was Jacob Simon. Did I mention our main character has a best friend named Jacob? I didn't? Well now I have. Coincidence? Yeah, but it's still a little creepy.
I loved the way this book addressed the guilt that can creep up in grief, especially when you were too young to understand the situation when it happened. I loved the way the book also addressed the way his older brother got all the attention, and that was okay because he needed it, but it made the younger brother feel a little alone never the less. Can you tell I relate? There were so many beautiful moments in this book, and the layer of mental illness added an honesty that I appreciated, although it was a little confusing at times. Definitely a worth while read.
Favorite Quotes:
"I'll tell you what happened because it will be a good way to introduce my brother. His name's Simon. I think you're going to like him. I really do. But in a couple of pages he'll be dead. And he was never the same after that" (5).
"But you notice it when he isn't there any more. You notice so many of the places where he isn't, and you hear so many of the things he doesn't say" (17).
"When Simon was alive he could be a bit of a sponge, soaking up the attention. He didn't mean to or anything, but that is what special needs do -- they demand more of the things around them. I seemed to go unnoticed" (25).
"Simon had hypotonia. He also had microgenia, macroglossia, epicanthic folds, an atrial septal defect, and a beautiful smiling face that looked like the moon" (31).
"The truth is, I didn't say that much myself. I didn't have so many memories of my own to share. Not whole memories, with beginnings, middles, and ends. I was only a little boy when I knew my big brother, and we don't get to choose what we keep" (305).
